It is what it is...

Jewish people say this a lot. I want to write a lot tonight. I just got a new roommate Casey, so I'm not alone anymore! Sara is coming tomorrow and I'm not gonna lie it's been hard her without her :(. Sometimes you have to have a partner here and I will always "find" someone but I rather just know she's there and that I'm not gonna be the odd one out, since it is still the beginning. Casey is from Palos Verdes, which is crazy because most people here don't even know where that is, which is kinda nice to not have that stereotype at first.

So today was easier then I thought. I got up at 7:30 ( I didn't sleep amazing but who does)...and had my first Israeli breakfast, which is American but faker and sweeter...I'm not fan of sweet things but " it is what it is." Next we had our first day of classes the first speaker spoke about women and prayer. I should tell you that I am in Jerusalem in Har Nof, in Neve Yerushalayim an all girls Seminary, which I basically see as college for your soul. There is a level of holiness and respect in your learning. It's just sincere, the whole experience.

So back to our first speaker on prayer and how to pray ect ect. I have been wondering about this a lot and if I'm even doing it right. I loved the way she put it. "Prayer is building a relationship with Hashem, circumstances, humanity...it's large!! and connects us all!" I also came to understand that prayers are WORDS not THOUGHTS, so even when we think something if we don't allow the diction experience when our thoughts turn into words the prayer is not as full as it could be. WORDS ARE THE ABSOLUTE BOND BETWEEN BODY AND SOUL. I learned that we should pray morning, noon and night which I remember at my days in Chabad but forgot quickly I guess...Prayer is not easy. So here is your step by step guide :) if there would be such a thing...

1. Praise! Praise G-d, he is the world and more. this gives purpose to everything and when there is purpose to everything relationships are important...you see where this is going??
2. Request! I always had trouble with this, I have been given so much and had it so easy I don't ever feel like I can request for more. But you can! Hashem listens to all prayers no matter how big or small...you may find it stupid to pray for your infected nose ring...when people are suffering the worst pain across the world, but Hashem will still listen :)

Boy do I need time, I mean the things I thought I knew...I really just have no idea. That's what my Memoir will be called....What I don't know... I mean you don't just get Judaism! You don't get to take some religious studies courses and be a theologian! it so much more and deep. I know I will need my whole life and more! But for now lets think on some of the things Mrs. Heller discussed to make this day one of mind blowing.

Step 3 to prayer:

3. Thanks! appreciation I believe comes from consciousness and knowing that all G-d has given us is a gift! and that we must give thanks for our body and soul and everything that it does! and everything we gain day to day. It's easy to live life dead. Thankfulness makes you alive.

Well I don't know about you guys but that basically blew my mind as I looked out the window on clear breezy sunny day with the most beautiful view of the Old City, it is really all overwhelming. And what do we do in between lectures? OF COURSE! "Coffee and Shmooze"...it's actually called that...

The next lecture is on LOVE...and no I haven't me the Jewish man of my dreams on this trip yet. We discussed the differences between infatuation and love. She used a beautiful example of a rose. You see a lovely rose and you just love it so much that you cut it off and take it to have. But if you loved it! You would water it and nurture it and keep it living. That is the difference between infatuation and love...get it? okay neither did I...but it takes time. Let's just say I have been in a whole lot of infatuation and not much love. we also talked about time bombs in relationships.
1. different religions
2. Overbearing mother
3. age gap ( more like a generation gap)
4. problematic exes
And I could go into it more but you get the point...But I say...How will I find a Jewish boy without an overbearing mother?
OY Vey...

We also met our individual teachers today to discuss any questions in small groups of two or three. My lead is Shira. She is wonderful, and a little sassy. From New York but now lives in Israel. We talked about Kabbalah, Torah...Are they the same? what's the rage? Ask me for answers when I get home if you care. I will have answers...or maybe I won't. As Rabbi Katz says its the questions that are more important. I mean if you don't ask the questions in the first place...where are you...

I am loving the food here, pita falafel, tahina, rice and more "Israeli salad" ( cucumber and tomato). I am catching on to some Hebrew and best of all I don't feel like that much of a tourist, in a way this is home.

Today we toured the Old City in Jerusalem. We visited the Kotel ( MY FIRST TIME) Now looking back on it I wish I knew how to put this experience in words or cohesive sentences but its a hard, so here is the list:
expectation was high
wanted to be moved
Scared I would be
the holiest place in the universe
my first time
what do I pray
how do I pray
and what will I write
Will G-d hear me here more than anywhere?
oh no...
make it good...

There I go scaring myself AGAIN! So I tried to make my prayer "good" and I don't want to say what I prayed for kinda like a birthday wish. But entering the kotel and praying and the wall seeing the women cry I was scared to touch it. I finally got the courage to put my prayer in and give thanks and of course I cried. But I don't know why. I think that's okay. I'd love to talk about this experience in person so ASK ME!

Next we went to dinner and I went with Shelley, Rachel and Hannah. The falafel man asked Shelley to make the falafel...only in israel...So she did and it was the best falafel I have ever had! Sorry Mom :) Then we took a tour of under the tunnels under the wall where I ran into Robert and AJ from CSUF! Hillel!!!...seriously Israel is small. Lastly we went to Ben Yahuda, almost the opposite of the Kotel, bars, clubs, girls who were...not so modest. I really was so exhausted I didn't feel like doing and thing but watch and sit....so I did.

Amen to today as it is 3am and I must be up soon. I can't believe it's Thursday

HOW DID I GET HERE!!!!??